Learning Through Observation

As a mother…

I want to teach my children to:

Love one another.

Share.

Walk through life with courage.

Be independent.

Look out for each other.

Be compassionate.

Be caring.

Be grateful.

Be gracious.

Be respectful.

Love God.

Cherish one another.

And so much more.

The longer I am a mother,

The more I realize these things are all taught

By them watching what I do.

What their father does.

While they hear what I say, they watch what I do more closely than

Anything I intentionally to tell them.

That being said,

And knowing they are watching,

I begin to think about all of the other things I am teaching them.

I am pretty sure I will do many things that will be packed

Into the suitcases of their mind creating baggage they will carry for the

Rest.

Of.

Their.

Lives.

So many of the lessons I show them are reflections of fear.

Fear!

There is that word again.

When I think about Mother’s Day,

I think about the role God has given me.

The gift of the children that he has entrusted to me.

I think of what I want them to learn by observation.

I think of what I wish I could hide from them.

Things that I know God doesn’t want to be a part of my life.

Things that many mothers need to be released from.

I am a child of God.

That should be where I find my identity.

I should hold to that FACT tightly.

This means I should NOT compare myself to others.

I am redeemed.

This changes everything.

My debt has been paid.

A debt I could never pay on my own.

I am forgiven.

I am forgiven.

I just want to sit in this thought for a moment.

EVERY day I wake up,

EVERY breath I take,

EVERY moment,

I need to remember I am forgiven.

My sins, and there are many, are washed away.

I am the mother God made for Noah and Collin.

If I would believe this truth,

I would not feel like a failure so often.

If God would have wanted a different mom for these

Precious boys, He would have done that.

He did not.

He chose me for the job!

The boys are not mine.

They are HIS!

There is so much freedom in knowing the boys are not mine.

I need to embrace this and live like this.

If I truly entrust my children into the hands of their Creator,

The pressure to always be perfect is released.

They have been entrusted to Aaron and I.

BUT

They are not ours.

They are HIS!

I will mess up.

This should not be a hard concept to wrap my brain around.

I am human.

I am sinful.

I do not know everything.

Therefore, I will mess up.

I need to trust that the God who holds the

Past, present, and future in the palm of His hands, knows this too.

I can not change God’s plan.

God is God.

His will, will be done.

Period.

I cannot throw a monkey wrench into the inner-workings of  His plan.

I need to relax.

Childhood moves fast.

I need to unplug more.

Stop comparing myself to other mom’s who do things “better” than I do them.

Interact more.

Yell less.

Be in the moment more.

Take more pictures.

Embrace spontaneous moments.

I need to stop questioning whether I deserve this life.

I DON’T.

I deserve death.

BUT Jesus paid it all so I may have life.

I need to trust.

Trust.

Easy, right?

Not so much.

I need to trust that God knows what He is doing.

IF I embrace these truths then the lessons the boys learn

Through observation will reflect the image of Christ.

What a gift.

 

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